Tired of Working on Yourself? Let Me Tell You Why..

My name's Mark, and you're listening to Head Straight. Hello, you lot, and welcome back. Today, I'm gonna be answering the question, why am I so tired of working on myself? Because there are times when working on yourself starts to feel just like it's too much. Because there comes a point when you don't want another tip, not another video, not another reminder, not another suggestion to journal, breathe, reflect, or work on yourself.

You're not saying growth is bad. You're not saying that you wanna go backwards. You're just tired. Tired of checking how you acted. Tired of thinking about your reactions afterwards.

Tired of feeling like every moment should turn into a lesson. Because it can start to feel like homework that never ends, like something you're always meant to be doing. And at some point, maybe quietly you think, do I really have to keep doing this? Why does everything have to be about improving? Can't I just live my life for a bit?

Now this episode is about that stage. Not giving up, not falling apart. Just the moment when trying to do better starts to feel really heavy even though you know it's helped. Now it's important to know if you're feeling this way, it doesn't mean that you've failed. Feeling tired of working on yourself doesn't mean something's gone wrong.

Most of the time it actually means the opposite. It means that you have been paying attention. It means that you've been catching yourself before reacting. It means that you have been trying to do things differently, and that takes effort. Even when it's good effort, it still uses energy.

So if you're fed up with it sometimes, that doesn't mean that you're failing. It usually means that you have been consistently trying for a while. And what's a real key component of this? It's when noticing yourself turns into overthinking. At first, noticing yourself is helpful.

You start spotting patterns. You realize what set you off. You catch things earlier than you used to. But if that never switches off, it can start to feel like too much. You might replay conversations in your head, go over what you said to a friend again and again and again.

Maybe you ask yourself if you handled things right or you think about reactions that don't really need thinking about. And it can start to feel like your own thoughts are just following you around. That's often when you start to feel worn out. Not because noticing yourself is bad, but because you're not meant to do it all of the time. Now if this is starting to sound familiar to you, you don't need to change anything straight away.

Just noticing that is enough. Now here's something that's important that often gets missed. Working on yourself isn't meant to stay front and center all the time. At the start, it needs tension. You think about what you're doing.

You practice doing things differently. You remind yourself. But later on, the idea is that it becomes more natural. Think about learning to ride a bike. I've used that example a lot.

At first, you think about balance constantly. Later, you just get on the bike and ride. If you keep analyzing every movement forever, you'd be exhausted, not safer. Growing as a person works in a similar way. If you never let it settle, it starts to feel like pressure instead of progress.

So let me tell you about the worry that keeps you watching yourself. Because underneath this tired feeling, there's often a small worry. It might sound something like, if I stop paying attention, then I'm gonna mess up again. So you keep checking yourself just in case. But by the time you're this tired, a lot of what you've learned has already stuck.

Letting yourself relax a bit doesn't undo your progress. It usually means that you don't need to work so hard anymore. So we need to think about this in terms of letting off the pressure without giving up. Because this episode isn't about stopping everything. It's about easing the pressure.

And that can look like not picking apart every reaction. Letting some of the small mistakes go without reviewing them. Maybe allowing some days to just be normal days. And trusting that you'll notice if something really really needs attention. You don't have to keep checking yourself all the time.

Doing that, it doesn't make growth stronger. This is really important to think about. Doing less can still be progress, but this part can feel confusing. I mean, it might feel like if I ease off, then I'm failing. But easing off isn't the same as quitting.

Sometimes it just means that you've reached a point where growth can carry itself, especially if you've been dealing with strong emotions, pressure from school, home, or friends, or there's been changes in your life, or you're carrying responsibility. Feeling tired doesn't mean you're broken. It usually means that you've just been carrying a lot. Now you need to know, growth still works when you're not thinking about it. One of the clearest signs of progress is this things still hold together even when you stop checking them.

You might calm down quicker, not spiral as far, move on sooner, or notice things before they blow up. And in those moments, you don't have to think about it every time. That doesn't mean that you've lost progress. It means growth is doing what it was supposed to do. And as we bring this episode to a close, let me tell you this.

You're allowed to rest from trying. If you're tired of working on yourself, that doesn't mean that you should stop caring about you. It might just mean you're ready to let what you've learned do more of the work for you. You're allowed to live your life without turning everything into a lesson. Sometimes growth doesn't need more effort.

It just needs space. In the next episode, we're gonna talk about how all of this starts to come together. When change doesn't feel separate anymore, but just part of how you live. Because the goal was never to work on yourself forever. It was to reach a point where you don't have to.

So are you up for it? Of course, you are.